If i was abused would i remember?

i hav little to no memory of when i was young (3-5yrs ish). so i was talking to my step mom about how my dad told us our mom touched us or something and my step mom told me my oldest sister says it happened and i nvr want to get close to my mom like the thought of even hugging disgusts me and i only feel tht way towards plus she was a drunk and did drugs when we were young she still does but only at night. i believe it could have happened but how could i hav no memory of it?